The Golden Rule: How We Interact With One Another
Are you better than anybody else?
We might not like to admit it, but we’ve all been guilty of thinking that way at one point or another.
But why?
Forget feeling superior because of your job title, the model of your car or your designer watch. In my opinion, we’re all born in our birthday suits - and eventually, we’re going to die that way, too. When you really think about it, everything in between is just fluff. We’re all more similar than we are different.
Empathy isn’t always innate
Yet, empathy is not innate. That doesn’t mean you’re a bad person - sometimes, thinking from other people’s perspectives does not come naturally to us. After all, we’re all the main characters in our own stories.
In fact, we’re experiencing a serious lack of empathy in the US today. A study by the University of Michigan found that the average modern American is less empathetic than most Americans were 30 years ago.
It’s time to make a conscious effort to change that. Over the past two years, I’ve gone on a journey of self-discovery and realized this firsthand. I’ve started shedding the layers of a self-important protection I once had, and instead gained a greater understanding of others around me, and in doing so became more aware of any lack of empathy.
Shaping how you interact with others
Why should you treat the waiter differently than the person who signs your paychecks?
The answer is, you shouldn’t.
Being a self-important, rude and dismissive person doesn’t get you further in life. “Nice guys finish last” is a myth. Ask yourself, what sort of person do you like to do business with? I can guarantee you, it’s not the bad guy.
Being mean is officially bad for business, too. Research published in Harvard Business Review found that half of staff reported being treated rudely at work at least once a week, which also resulted in decreased productivity, efficiency and bottom lines.
We’ll all go through ups and downs in life. One thing that’s certain, though, is that if you behave badly while you're down, you'll behave badly when you're up. Once you respond with spite, you’re essentially disregarding other people’s feelings - that is, to be without empathy. The adverse effect is that it removes other people’s empathy for you, too.
How to deal with someone else’s lack of empathy
It works both ways. Many times in my life, as I’m sure we all have, I’ve found out that others were talking behind my back or making comments about myself I didn’t like. It hurts to hear - it would hurt anyone - but a big learning on this journey is also that what others may say about you is really a reflection of their own insecurities, and shouldn’t get you down.
You control yourself. The most powerful thing you can ever do is own that.
That’s why my self worth doesn’t come from seeking the approval of others. It comes from the journey of discovery I’ve been on - and am constantly on.
One golden rule I’ll always stick by, though? To treat everyone I cross paths with, with empathy and respect - no matter who they are.
How important is empathy to your values?
